Libuše Jarcovjáková, who’s been dubbed the “Nan Goldin of Czechoslovakia”, finds herself in a stifling environment after the Prague Spring of 1968. There are few places where she can express herself freely or explore her sexuality. The camera as her constant companion — and the source of the film’s material, made up of her innumerable photographs and diary excerpts — sees her go to West Berlin, escape to Tokyo, and return to Europe.
After the Soviet invasion in Prague, times of enormous suffocation were lived by a young female who was certain that she didn’t want to be a mother, who was attracted to the queer scene and who wanted to be… a photographer. This photographer felt the visceral urge to free herself and escape from the country where she was born. Her name is Libuše Jarcovjáková and her camera is her constant companion, capturing the days and mostly the nights in thousands of analogue photographs:
Captures the queer scene in Prague, the marginalized T-Club, flees to West Berlin and years later witnesses the fall of the Iron Curtain, flies to Tokyo where she ventures into fashion photography, returns to Europe, returns home, risks to leave again. And she seeks to discover who she is, narrating dilemmas that prove to be timeless.
With only photographs and diary entries she reads out herself, in I’M NOT EVERYTHING I WANT TO BE (one of the most beautiful titles!) artist Libuše Jarcovjáková and director Klára Tasovská construct an intimate and courageous portrait of her incessant search for her identity, of the knowledge of one’s own body, of the discovery of sexuality, of the invaluable emancipation, of the simple day-to-day life, and of the complex webs of emotions.
It’s the story of Libuše told by Klára in a precious documentary, a journey through History and the stories of being a Woman, an astonishing film that deserves endless compliments and a film that fully represents the spirit of independent cinema. Between the play of lights, a montage where the still images become moving images and the most stunning music, this is a sensorial experience. Cinema and photography dissolve, life is imprinted on the retina.
It’s with great joy that we’ll welcome the director and the photographer at IndieLisboa. A national premiere not to be missed! (Alexandra Ferraz)
